after a lengthy absence, i have decided to start blogging again.

so what happened, what brought you back? 

to answer these questions, let us rewind, back to the first week of school, at about 10:40 on wednesday, to be exact.

we were doing those annoying introductions, tell us your name, tell us your major, tell us your ethnicity when one introduction caught my attention. my name is h a, my major is communications, and i am an exchange student from the united arab emirates.

i love photography, for those who do not know. by no means am i a photographer, but that does not mean i do not or cannot appreciate good photography and photographers. she must have the coolest pictures of her country i thought to myself. i decided then i wanted to get to know h.

imagine my delight then, when she sat beside me the next week. are you into photography? do you have instagram? of course she did. we then swapped handles, followed each other, became mutually awed, and clicked from that point on.

i love your captions, they are so interesting, i can tell you write. do you have writing anywhere, a blog, anything? she asked me the following week. naturally, i pointed her here to my wordpress which i shamefully have not updated in over a year. i had been contemplating it for a while now, to jump back on board with my blog, to be honest.

but it is what she said after she read my scanty blog that inspired me to really log back in: your posts on the blog are so clear and meaningful! please write some more! i wished there were more posts to read, they are all so intriguing, honestly speaking.

and so that is why i am back here. i received that kick, that push start i personally needed.



Regardless of where you were born…you will always have advantages and disadvantages based on being born and raised there. For example, some look and say you’re more disadvantaged if you’re born in a third world country over a first world one…but I don’t fully agree. That’s just where the material things are concerned, that people conclude first world countries are more advantaged. But like I said before, there are advantages and disadvantages, each merely highlighted and focused on when two countries are compared.
Where my life is concerned, I feel my head is filled with mostly book knowledge, but not enough about life’s general knowledge. Which is a disadvantage for me. I look at my mom, who stands opposite to me; she had more knowledge and skills pertaining to life than me at my present age. No doubt, because of where she was born and raised, and where I was born and raised. Moving along however, I wonder if she knew, that by the age of 22, she would be in Canada? I wonder if she was prepared to leave her whole family and life behind to follow my dad and start fresh? I wonder how she did it? I wonder if she wanted to move here? I wonder if she was prepared? I wonder if she knew she wouldn’t go back home for decades to come? If she knew, would she have left?
For me, as much as I want to leave Canada, I know I will eventually be drawn right back here. When the things I like get overbearing, I get sick of them. I put as much space as I can between myself and the thing, if only temporarily. I want to move to France, but I don’t see myself living there for more than 5 years. And besides. I don’t know if I could leave everything behind like my mom did. I guess the reason for my unwillingness to run, is because I’m not running from much. I don’t think France would necessarily offer me a better life. It would not offer me anything much, that Canada could not or can not offer me.
From my mom’s standpoint now, her running to Canada meant running from a little, to a lot. She grew up in the country side of Jamaica, near a fishing village. With so many siblings, I will not say how many, it was hard to make things stretch. She heard about “farin” (Jamaican Patois for “foreign,” foreign meaning of course any over developed English speaking country such as Canada, America, and England) as a girl but never once dreamed she would get the chance to live and have children there. Now in her early 40’s, my mom like other Jamaican born people, has established a comfortable life over here in an “overseas” (Jamaicans sometimes use that word interchangeably with “farin”) country. But I wonder if they are all happy. I know materially some may have more, but I wonder if it was worth losing who they really once were for it all. I wonder if it was worth shifting mentalities and changing their way of thinking for. I wonder if it was worth severing most ties with their island for. I wonder.
Below are some photos of what my mom’s community in Clarendon, Jamaica looks like today
IMG_4349 IMG_2558 IMG_2568 IMG_2483